I love this and you beat me to the post

It was incapable of directing me to the correct department despite my responding to each question with the word 'exterminate' in a metallic voice.
Well this bit had me in fits: "I purchased a Large Hadron Collider a few months back but it has not seen much use. The one time I did manage to get it working, I ended up at the day before I unpacked it so this wouldn't count."